Shundo David Haye – Zen Priest

‘Usually, because we do something with some aim and we want to do something [in a] more perfect way, sometime you do not– you are not satisfied with what you do, and sometime you will be pleased with what you did. When this kind of discrimination happens, that activity is not anymore true activity– at least your understanding of the activity you have done is not true activity itself. It is already a dead idea within your mind. And actual limitless activity is no more. So if you think zazen practice will be the same as our usual practice, there there is big misunderstanding.

Zazen practice is fundamental practice which you should always– you should not always lose. We say, “Because of our practice the mountain is high. Because of our practice, the sea is deep. Because of practice, bird flies. Because of practice, fish swims.” It is actually so, but fish do not know where he is. We do not know where we are. We are in the air, but we do not aware of where we are because we do not feel anything in the air. So you do not feel anything. But without air, we cannot live.

Whatever you do, that is actually our true practice. But you are pleased with the limited pleasure of the practice, and you do not know the boundless meaning of our everyday life. And we always complain with what you have to do, or with what you have done, or what you should do. So you are always forced [into] something in your every day life. You feel as if you are living in some certain framework. If you come to Tassajara, you should observe our way. But when you are– you do not realize the true meaning of your life, a rule is just a kind of framework in which you are put.

But– so you think zazen is the same– a kind of rules you have to do. But if you realize what is our true practice, you will have no more this kind of mixed-up idea. In its true sense, zazen should not be practiced because zazen gives you some advantage in your life, or zazen should not be dismissed because of its hardship of practice. Why we practice zazen is just because we always spoil our life and spoil our practice– true practice in our everyday life. So our effort is directed to the– to the opposite way. We do not practice our way to attain something, but we practice zazen to be free from a dualistic gaining idea.’ (from the Suzuki Roshi Archive)