Shundo David Haye – Zen Priest

After my Monday group had discussed Suzuki Roshi’s 1967 sesshin lecture last week, I reflected on what I had said, and used that as the topic for the Thursday evening Zen Center group. Here is a transcript of what I said (on Patreon this Saturday, I will post one of the questions I received, and the answer I gave):

‘What I wanted to talk about this evening was our meditation practice. There are two Japanese words that we tend to use for this kind of sitting. One is zazen, the most common one, which means seated zen, seated concentration, seated meditation. And the other one is shikantaza. I’m not much of a scholar of Japanese, so I can’t translate it exactly, but we usually translate that as just sitting. which is really sitting with nothing else, no other purpose, no sense of attainment.

Just throwing yourself into the present moment, as I heard another teacher talk about it recently. Just being with whatever arises for you internally and externally during the time you’re sitting. So for my last 20 minutes, that was feeling a little uncomfortable, feeling a little warm, and also turning over in my head some of the things I might be saying tonight. 

But particularly I wanted to share some words from Suzuki Roshi, the founder of San Francisco Zen Center. So on Mondays I have a group where we discuss Suzuki Roshi’s talks. And recently we’ve been looking at the early days of Tassajara – the training monastery that Suzuki Roshi founded in 1967. And during that year in August and December, And they did two sesshins, two longer retreats. And Suzuki Roshi spoke twice a day during these retreats. And, you know, I find these talks particularly interesting because it’s really him setting out his, I wouldn’t say deeper teachings, but really what he wanted to focus on with his most serious students as they were developing their practice.

So I find these talks very interesting. And the talk we looked at this week was from the first day of the December sesshin, so it was a seven-day sesshin, and he’s talking about Zazen. I just want to read a couple of paragraphs, which is very, very slightly edited, but mostly Suzuki Roshi’s slightly idiosyncratic English. 

Whatever you do, that is actually our true practice. But you are pleased with the limited pleasure of the practice, and you do not know the boundless meaning of our everyday life. And we always complain with what you have to do or with what you have done or what you should do. So you are always forced into something in your everyday life. You feel as if you are living in some certain framework. If you come to Tassajara, you should observe our way. But when you do not realize the true meaning of your life, a rule is just a kind of framework in which you are put. So you think zazen is the same – a kind of rules you have to do. 

But if you realize what is our true practice, you will have no more this kind of mixed-up idea. In its true sense, Zazen should not be practiced because Zazen gives you some advantage in your life. Or Zazen should not be dismissed because of its hardship of practice. Why we practice Zazen is just because we always spoil our life and spoil our practice — true practice in our everyday life. So our effort is directed to the opposite way. We do not practice our way to attain something, but we practice zazen to be free from a dualistic gaining idea. If you want to know what is zazen, you must practice it. Even though you ask someone what is zazen, he will not give you the right idea of right practice. Even if she could say something about it, you wouldn’t be able to understand it by words. To have direct experience of it is the only way to know what is zazen.

So to participate with practice or with the great activity is the only way to be familiar with it. So in this sense, whatever you do, if you do not mix up understanding in this area, that is true understanding. So in this sense, before I say zazen is quite different practice from other activities. But now I can say zazen is not different from the other activities we have. Only because your understanding is mixed up, I should say zazen is quite different practice from other practice. 

And so in the group on Monday, we had a discussion about how you could say, on the one hand zazen is the same as every other practice, and on the other hand zazen is different from every other practice. And I think this is not just one of those Zen paradoxes that we’re always enjoying. 

I think what he means in this case is that, you know, ordinarily in our everyday life, we go through every activity with our discriminating mind. You know, we’re making these conceptual distinctions between good, bad, enjoying, not enjoying, must do more of this, don’t want to do so much of that. And that is our normal practice. That’s how we live our lives. Zazen is the opportunity to not do that. It’s the opportunity to just sit there and be with the present moment without getting caught up, you know, we try not to get caught up in whatever conceptual framework we’re putting around what’s happening to us in the moment. And so this zazen is kind of the unformed or the undiscriminated activity. So in that sense it’s different. So we’re used to discriminating as we go through life and we try in zazen not to discriminate. not have any ideas about what’s going to happen or what we want to get out of it. But I think the way it’s the same is that once we’ve practiced this enough, we can start taking that attitude into the activities of the rest of our life. So whenever we’re out and about in the world, instead of just having our discriminating ideas about it, like, I want to do this, I want to do more of that, we can do each activity with this kind of slightly more open mind, slightly less discriminating, slightly more content with non-attainment, maybe. You know, whatever turns out, whatever happens, we’re okay with what’s happened. It might not be what we wanted to happen, but we’re okay with it. 

And  if things happen, we don’t get caught up in, oh, this was a great thing, or this is a terrible thing. It doesn’t mean that we don’t think those things, but we don’t get, we don’t hold on to them in the same way. Because most of our life we say, okay, this thing is good. I’m holding on to the idea that this thing is good. And I’m always going to think this thing is good. Or that thing is bad. I’m always going to hold on to the idea that this thing is bad. So if we can take the spirit of Zazen, the spirit of just sitting, just being with whatever arises in the moment, then it’s the same as every other activity.’